Let me start this off by saying that I am not a masochist. I do not enjoy pain nor do I encourage the administering of pain on to others. How can a person feel pain? There is obviously physical pain. Discomfort can strengthen our threshold but physical injury rarely has positive effects. Everybody feels this pain at some point in their life, as it is an almost inevitable occurrence This is not the beautiful sort of pain that I am speaking about. Pain inflicted within the mind, past the flesh of the brain deep into our souls, this is the beautiful kind of pain.
Psychological/emotional torture hurts, I mean, it really hurts. I once had a discussion with my friend about how painful certain situations can be, "I would much rather have a bone broken or be in a car accident, I would much rather feel an extreme amount of physical pain than feel what I'm feeling right now.", I said. "That is because physical pain eventually heals.", he retorted. I knew he could really understand what I was feeling when he responded with those words. A person who has never felt a great deal of emotional pain would most likely simply state to focus on something else but to say that it was such a strong feeling that would never go away, I knew he got it. I am not saying that if we are hurt by an event, a person or something else that we will never get over it, definitely not. But in that moment or during that time, we cannot think about anything else, we cannot breathe an easy breath and our mind feels like a prison.
This dark time can create a deep void within us. It's like having a black hole in your heart. We can try to fill that empty space but everything just gets sucked in and lost in oblivion. The more we try to find something to give us fulfillment, the larger the whole becomes. How does one cope with all of this? The first thing is to allow yourself to feel all that you need to feel. I had a dear friend suffering from difficulties in life so rather than letting herself feel her pain, she filled the void with alcohol and drugs and eventually committed suicide. A person must allow them self to process what is causing them the pain, what the true solution is, how to achieve it and how to find happiness if/when they cannot achieve the result they are looking for.
So, where is the beauty in all of this pain? The amazing part of all of these feelings and emotions is how much strength it truly gives us. Initially, we will feel weak, we will not be in control of our emotions and may even lose control of our conscious thoughts. Once we learn to tame our emotions, there is nothing that can bring us any further down. Every single person who has had their heart broken by somebody they loved, have been abused by a parent or anybody else may always be haunted by that rejection. That rejection is a black hole. Once we are in control of that black hole, we choose to either let it grow and ruin other aspects of our lives or shrink it by reaching into it and pulling out things to take back our happiness.
The beauty of the pain is that it can define us. It can change us to become the best version of ourselves that ever lived; this is not something we could possibly achieve without having to go through such experiences. For anybody going through heartache, heartbreak, agony, torture or something seemingly insurmountable, remember that only you are in control in how you make it out. From my own observation, the most admirable people were the ones who had gone through the most difficulties because they took all of that previous negativity, captured it in one place and locked it up in a place where it could not escape. To become an amazingly positive person, sometimes we must first go through amazingly difficult circumstances. There is always light at the end of that tunnel and it is never over until the day we die.
Psychological/emotional torture hurts, I mean, it really hurts. I once had a discussion with my friend about how painful certain situations can be, "I would much rather have a bone broken or be in a car accident, I would much rather feel an extreme amount of physical pain than feel what I'm feeling right now.", I said. "That is because physical pain eventually heals.", he retorted. I knew he could really understand what I was feeling when he responded with those words. A person who has never felt a great deal of emotional pain would most likely simply state to focus on something else but to say that it was such a strong feeling that would never go away, I knew he got it. I am not saying that if we are hurt by an event, a person or something else that we will never get over it, definitely not. But in that moment or during that time, we cannot think about anything else, we cannot breathe an easy breath and our mind feels like a prison.
This dark time can create a deep void within us. It's like having a black hole in your heart. We can try to fill that empty space but everything just gets sucked in and lost in oblivion. The more we try to find something to give us fulfillment, the larger the whole becomes. How does one cope with all of this? The first thing is to allow yourself to feel all that you need to feel. I had a dear friend suffering from difficulties in life so rather than letting herself feel her pain, she filled the void with alcohol and drugs and eventually committed suicide. A person must allow them self to process what is causing them the pain, what the true solution is, how to achieve it and how to find happiness if/when they cannot achieve the result they are looking for.
The beauty of the pain is that it can define us. It can change us to become the best version of ourselves that ever lived; this is not something we could possibly achieve without having to go through such experiences. For anybody going through heartache, heartbreak, agony, torture or something seemingly insurmountable, remember that only you are in control in how you make it out. From my own observation, the most admirable people were the ones who had gone through the most difficulties because they took all of that previous negativity, captured it in one place and locked it up in a place where it could not escape. To become an amazingly positive person, sometimes we must first go through amazingly difficult circumstances. There is always light at the end of that tunnel and it is never over until the day we die.
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